Alice in Wonderland: a tim burton movie that i DON'T dislike

Alice In Wonderland 3-D: movie directed by tim burton

well, it's considerably after breakfast, but exposure to this movie has led me to believe six impossible things, at the very least:
1. johnny depp's makeup was more cool than it was annoying. i never thought that that would be the case.
2. mixing the music from coraline together with an averil lavigne single wasn't a great idea for the soundtrack. oh, wait, no, that's not an impossible thing. that's a quite possible thing, one that proved profoundly and omnipresently true.
3. no matter how often alice shrank, grew, snagged herself on things, changed outfits, and beheaded stuff, her hair just kept looking better and better.
4. questions about ravens and writing desks DO make for a bittersweet goodbye.
5. girls can do anything they want to! i mean, my head can hardly believe it, but my heart knew it all along. even in edwardian england, you know, girls can be arrested and scorned and starve themselves for the right to vote...or they can become merchant marine apprentices, and go all the way to china. wearing cute, butch baby blue coats. yeah, alice, as she was portrayed at the end of this movie, definitely went on to make passionate, sapphic love to a series of women, much like that tom-lady in tipping the velvet.
6. i liked it.

i liked the pacing, for one thing--it didn't go too slow, and it wasn't overly irritating. i liked the plot--i feel like it mixed up a few too many things, but at least there was a plot. i liked the acting, mostly, and the cgi animals were really fun. i even liked the parts that they borrowed from lord of the rings, because said borrowings seemed appropriate, and possibly cut down on at least some of the cgi budget. i liked all of it, in fact, except when they were talking at each other, because the serious dialogue was a little bit unendurable. i mean, lewis carroll was a master of nonsense, but even he couldn't have anticipated the way that "serious" dialogue in films such as this--films that don't actually have time for such things as serious dialogue--would go.

and really, tim burton? you're really going to turn the mad hatter into a quasi-heroic love interest? next time just cast johnny depp as the doormouse. or maybe the red queen. either of those characters would have made just as appropriate romantic leads as the mad hatter, plus johnny depp playing either of them would have been impressively quixotic as opposed to overly tim burtonesque: it's time to let edward scissorhands go, man! i mean, when david bowie and jennifer connelly rode that romantical yet oh so creepy fantastically-costumed older man/teen girl wave, that tension was basically the only thing that made labyrinth interesting (aside from the puppets). i'd say the opposite is kind of the case with alice in wonderland. not that both alice and johnny didn't play their parts well, just that, i mean, give them a fighting chance.

ah, it feels good to snark again. speaking of lewis carroll references. go ahead and start hunting it, for i have unleashed the snark. i really did enjoy the movie. if you're going to see stuff that's currently in 3-d, why not not make it ferngully? that is, avatar. sorry. (snark--away!)

i also really liked the fashions, but not as much as i bet hot topic's going to when they start selling alice spin-off dresses.